Week 2 Days

Become Best Friends with Your Anger | Day 10

What if anger wasn’t your enemy, but a valuable ally?

Most of us are taught to manage our anger, but what if we could actually use our anger to move forward in our lives? What if the screaming teakettle in our mind was actually just an alert to pay attention to ourselves more? Lots of times, we bottle up our anger, only to let it leak out in sudden or unexpected outbursts. But when we address this anger in the moment, it helps us to discover the root causes or feelings beneath it…which could include fear, sorrow, or justifiable indignation about having our boundaries violated.

Bottom line? Anger is not your problem. It’s really just an expression of something that got triggered because it needs your attention. Sure, it’s not usually comfortable to feel (especially if we’ve been taught to be nice at all costs) and it can sometimes come out in ugly ways when you choose to lash out at other people—but skillfully giving it a voice actually leads you to giving yourself whatever you need, from a place of compassion rather than control.


Think about a situation or person in your life that is currently bringing up feelings of anger. Express that anger however you want to, in a safe and contained space. Maybe you want to break dishes against a brick wall. Maybe you can you take it all out on a punching bag at the gym. Possibly, your preferred way is screaming into a pillow. Whatever the case, funnel your anger into whatever you are doing. Let the anger take over until your story about it is replaced by the pure energy of it. Afterwards, ask yourself if you feel different. Now that you’ve given the anger a safe outlet, ask: What is my anger showing me about myself? What do I need in this moment?

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