Week 2 Days

Sit in Your Mess | Day 12

What if your messiness holds the keys to your liberation?

Most of us don’t like the connotations of the word messy. It might make us think of compulsive hoarders, stained clothing, or a number of other things that don’t exactly make us want to embrace it with open arms. 

Messiness is different for everyone, but when it comes down to it, it’s about letting go of control.

So naturally, our resistance to our mess comes from our need to exert control over the circumstances of our lives. This is a normal desire, but sometimes it can send us overboard into the habit of keeping up appearances and ensuring that everything is in its place, even if the world around us is falling apart.

Our desire for control comes from our need to feel safe, but when we allow the façade to crumble somewhat, we are able to discover new aspects of ourselves. When we aren’t so busy controlling absolutely everything in our lives (and, ironically, for some people, the messy house or hoarding habit is their form of control), our brilliance rises up naturally to the surface and surprises us with its beauty.


Take some time to think about the way your messiness manifests. A good indication of this is feeling the need to be perfect or seem like you have it all together. For example, maybe you’re obsessed with having a clean house. Perhaps you can’t bear the thought of walking out the door without makeup. Look at the places in your life where you try to project this idealized image of who you are. Now, take the anchor that you created during the first day of the course and hold on to it as you simply let yourself sit in the mess. This could look like being in the middle of your messy house, or going about your day in sweatpants and zero makeup. Maybe it means just having a good, long cry. Don’t try to fix anything here. Just sit in the eye of the storm and breathe. If you can, allow love and appreciation for yourself to emerge from this place. And remember, the world isn’t going to fall apart if you aren’t perfect. If anything, it might end up getting bigger, shinier, and way more interesting. How do you feel now?

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