Week 4 Days

Take Self-Responsibility | Day 26

What if you were responsible for everything that showed up in your life?

Just imagine what life would be like if we lived in a world of people who were willing to do their inner and outer work instead of constantly pointing their fingers and blaming others. In healing our own pain, we would learn to deal with the hurts of the world in ways that are empowering rather than fixated on what isn’t working. Instead of “saving” humanity, we would be in a better position to support and uplift it.

Just know that today isn’t about blaming yourself for all the crappy things that have happened in your life. It’s about recognizing where you have the power to change things, and how your willingness to take responsibility for your experiences, and learn from your life lessons, can change you for the better.

You must embrace your shadow and be aware of how shame and blame have affected your ability to live a life of peace, joy, and authenticity. Knowing yourself—from your most debilitating shortcomings to your most radiant strengths—gives you the kind of perspective that allows for greater self-responsibility. When you do this, you can make conscious choices instead of operating from what I refer to as “random reaction mode,” which lets the gremlins of fear, shame, and self-doubt run amok like out-of-control viruses.

Activity

Get real with what is happening in your life today. List four things you blame other people for—which might range from factors as trivial as traffic to ones as big as why you can’t have the intimate relationship you might long for. Now, make the simple decision that you will take self-responsibility—meaning not that you are going to turn around and blame yourself, but that you will take your power back. You will get clear and compassionate about the places where you can take more accountability and recognize how your choices have affected your outcomes. You will also ask yourself where you have the power to change the situation, instead of dwelling on what went wrong and who made it so. Lighten up while you’re at it! For example, when you find yourself complaining about how busy you are or how inundated you feel by your kids’/colleagues’/partner’s needs and requests, gently laugh at yourself and notice how your judgments affect everything from the sensations in your body to your emotional state.

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